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Gay Wedding?



Gay Weddings

DJ Skippy

Editors Note: Earlier this year on our sister site DJchat.com we had multiple posted requests for information on how to DJ a gay wedding/commitment. The best response was from DJ Skippy in Australia so as a service to our readers we requested she compose an article to help educate all the DJs both gay and straight how to handle such events and what music to have on hand.

So, what's the difference between a "straight (male/female)" wedding and a "gay (male/male or female/female)" wedding/commitment ceremony ?

Well other than the lack of opposite sex as the partner - not much...; well OK a lot of little things like:

  1. No Mr and Mrs - the couple may not want to be called anything or may want to be called something like "Miss(Ms)/Mr ...;...; and Miss(Ms)/Mr ...;.." or by their first names.

  2. You may have 2 brides or 2 grooms or 1 female in bridal outfit and one in tux or both in tuxes or both dressed in absolutely anything...;. No dress regulations apply.
  3. You may have flower boys and girls (including those who are adults), your "Bestman" may be a woman and your "matron of honor" maybe a man.
  4. You probably won't have a ceremony at a church (although Metropolitan Community Churches and a few others allow it). The Ceremony maybe in the same place as where the reception is.
  5. There is likely to be a Celebrant not a Minister or Priest.
  6. The guests include family & friends who may be gay, straight, bisexual, transsexual with ages from children to grandparents.

So are you feeling like "what am I going to do"? Here are Skippy's guidelines for being a DJ at a Gay Wedding/Commitment Ceremony and or reception.

Ask them the same questions as you would ask any other couple who you are assisting in planning a wedding, such as what speeches, introductions, wedding cake, wedding dances, garter toss, banquet tossing etc. that are planned. Be sure to ask what they would like to hear for their "Wedding Dance". It could be anything from Shania Twain's "From This Moment" or even "Tennessee Waltz" by Ann Murray to some Techno/Dance number like "Believe" by Cher...; remember no standard rules apply.

Tip for follow-up songs - any slow number usually sung by a female artist that has no gender specific details for girls, and gay guys also normally prefer female artists.

All music will depend on:

  1. The mix of the guests such as, all gays or a mixture of straight and gays.

  2. Age variations of guests.
  3. Personally, I find that boys like house/techno of 130 bpm and up, whereas girls like a mix from 118 bpm to house/techno. Girls tend to like dance versions of songs played on the radio such as Shania Twain's "If You're Not In It For Love".
  4. Gay anthem songs here included "I Am What I Am" - Gloria Gaynor, "Pride" - Johnna, "Free Gay & Happy" - Coming Out Crew, "I'm Coming Out" - Diana Ross (Dance version), "Chain Reaction" - Diana Ross (girls here love it always), "Believe" - Cher (current fav)
  5. All dance mixes such as "Together Again" - Janet Jackson, Artists such as "Sash!", "DJ PeeWee Ferris", Whitney Houston, Ultra Nate, Club54 soundtrack, Sarah Mclaughin (girls), KD Lang (girls), Kylie Minogue, Diana King, DJ Dado, Hannah Jones, Alison Limerick, Bronski Beat, Jimmy Sommerville, Diana Ross (Dance versions)..
  6. Dance Standards include Nutbush City Limits (extended Mix), Macrena, Bus Stop and even Boot Scooting Boogie...;

My best advice would be to ask them what they want. Remember above all else, regardless of sex, those two people are prepared to stand up in front of all their friends and family and say "I love this woman/man and want to spend the rest of my life with her/him". And of course they want it to go as wonderfully as anyone else on their wedding day.

Also you get a bonus - two brides... so both should look radiant or two grooms who look handsome or even one bride and one groom just the same sex. You may find however, that they both may wear tux's or gowns.

Lesbians have a color, its Purple (Don't know why myself) and Gay boys have pink.

Remember above all else...; it maybe a "Wedding/Commitment Ceremony" but to most couples - its also a HUGE party to celebrate with friends and families.

Out there in the big wide world - they say that 1 in 10 people are gay, so that means that its possible that for every 20 "straight weddings" there maybe one gay one.

Cheers DJ Skippy



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